The Wandering Dead

Mr Willy Boly. In the post because I’m glad he’s back and I love Willy Boly

Now you would look at this title and think to yourself,”ar yam right…Walking jed” but no. I thought Wolves looked a little more shapy a little more movey abouty last night. Let’s talk about it.

Walking Dead was a few seasons of Zombie drama on the telly…I think it’s still on to be honest. I wasn’t a great watcher of it, it was a little too gory for my simple tastes. It was mental the first few seasons. Full of action and madness, new characters being introduced here there and everywhere. Sometimes the storylines didn’t pan out the way you wanted to. Some characters would be killed off. Normally chomped on by someone who looked like they had just stepped out of the Hawthorns most the time. You know, badly dressed, dirty, bad trims the lot. These characters replaced by other actors who slowly but surely made the parts their own. Then it got silly. Story arcs were convoluted tangles of errant story telling. Characters would disappear from view then pop up again. Formerly strong characters became a bit rubbish, a little too shallow for the drama.

Ringing any bells yet? I watched last nights match with a little hope that the story might be getting into it’s stride a little. Maybe the main characters realisation that they may see their relatives again seeing as the travel ban may be up would possibly galvanise the team into some sort of coherent form . That didn’t happen in any great or meaningful way. Instead I watched it with dead zombie eyes drooling occasionally and grunting at the Referee every few minutes. Moaning. Football is shit this season isn’t it? You can tell that by every teams performance this season. It’s a nothing season. This is where the actors flush with success tend to sit back a little and think the story line is weak so our acting also has to be weak. Perhaps the football has become nothing more than a rehearsal for when the opening night kicks off and we are resplendent in our love seeing these performers actually performing. You can’t blame Wolverhampton Wanderers. You can’t pin point any particular problem over why these strange surreal performances leave us scratching our balls (if you have them) and going onto social media for a good moan and Twittering becomes Twattering. It’s also really easy to get caught up in the general hysteria that results like this can cause. But I’m not hysterical. I’m just watching something very strange on the TV. It looks like football. Moutinho has space now because we are playing football against a proper football team. So no, they don’t have to wang a neck on the pitch to negate the movement of Moutinho. They have players that are quality enough to keep one eye on him and one eye on their own game. This allows Moutinho to look sparkly and fresh, a little like we used to know him. He had the space. Quality opposition and football brings out (sometimes) the best in our players.

But we are still wandering. Still on that insipid, septic, contagious drama where the story arc of season 4 is flat, insipid, lukewarm. It’s a bad pint of a season. Football in general I suspect is being killed off by VAR, confused officials, cost, the FA’s cack handed administration, lets play football death bingo eh? Chuck in all the things that are bad about the game we love. Pick any colour mate. For me I handle it all by watching old matches and reading about them. Reconnecting with what I love about the game and wonder if we have lost the plot all together. Season 4 is crap. People turning off in droves. It means nothing, this game, without us. I see it down the canal every day. It’s a Vox pop hub the canal is. Because you see most people who use the canal live by it. So they are working class folk. Remember it’s our game. So I stop folk and ask them about the game and spend a couple of minutes being sociable. But I hear everything down there. Some people aren’t that bothered. They are not there so it doesn’t affect them. They are waiting for the football to start again so they can get in the pub and throw a few pints down their necks. Some people are angry and they want answers and they want them quick. Others are stoic, stubborn, Black Country born and bred. Seen it all before, hang tight, hold on, the storm will pass. For some it will of course. Some people are not going back to Molineux. They have found new things to do. Lockdown Football has given them nothing so they have had to fill their Saturdays and weekends with other activities…some are much cheaper than football and they enjoy this new thing. Still Wolves fans of course. But something has gone from the game. Something has been taken away.

During the game Rui gets kneed in the head by Conor. This was where I nearly threw the laptop through the window. What the absolute fuck? Now reports say that he is going to be ok and that fills me with joy, I mean Rui for me has to be in the running for player of the season surely? I mean who else would you give it to? Neto maybe? He had a rough one last night but hey it was his birthday in the week and it’s obvious that a few sparkly beverages were necked and things went on until late O’clock. We can forgive him that one. Lets mention one of the former actors from this series who makes a cameo appearance in “The Wanderers” tonight and plays a blinder of a part. Busting a shot past Rui. He doesn’t really celebrate that much…which is good in my book. The performance was a smidgeon up on the last one for sure. Movement was happening, roles were being investigated thoroughly by our performers. Semedo must have had some words with Nuno because he looked dangerous. He was getting clattered a lot which tells me there was something going on in his head. He was moving well off the ball and having a pop. I mean normally when I watch Wolves I make a cup of tea at kick off because there wont be anything to see until 55 minutes. But Wolves look sharp, they are making space and hang on….what’s this? They also look a bit aggressive too! Shock horror. Wolves actually look like Wolves a bit. Perhaps they were inspired by seeing their families again, who knows. I like this though. My tea actually went a bit cold. Again the Officials seemed to be scared to wave a flag or act like officials. That Semedo chance…few other occasions. We had a good shout for a few penalties but ya know. It’s just Wolves. Nobody likes us. Chinese own the club. Who cares. I told you they wouldn’t like us once we started sitting at the big table. There is an anti Wolves narrative in the media. I suspect it’s to do with a lot of Anti Chinese sentiment at a Government level. I suspect the Old Boy network throbs at the mention of our name. I wonder if that Anti Wolves narrative also stretched to Officials. I do wonder sometimes.

Liverpool are just Liverpool really. Great players in there. Brilliant players really if they even manage to apply some of their mind to playing football rather than drowning in that Scouse insanity that hangs around their club. Other great players have sunk and drowned in it before now, choking up the bile that their fans unleash every time something goes a little wrong or weird. Mane, Salah are cutting shapes, Jota too. They look like Wolves used to look and even if we are maybe pulling ourselves up in the midst of this poor dialogue and shaky scenery I still wish we would rediscover…something. Pull out a magical moment. I thought Ruben would bury the free kick he had but alas. It was a stinger for sure but ultimately dysfunctional. There was no anger there. Movement for sure, and intent let down by the inability to bend down and cut the throat of the game.

So in conclusion. Blah a One-Nil loss at home to last seasons Champions I can deal with. The whole season of dysfunction and infection too. I think when this God awful ‘Season’ finishes we should all take a moment to reflect on it and then shove it away like a pair of beautiful but unwearable shoes. I suspect that the slightly eccentric substitutions were another symptom of Covidball. There’s no way I can even attempt to work those out not having all the information to hand but I will say this…I suspect there will be a lot of players moving out of this club in the summer. Names we know intimately and love. Nuno demands that his players stand up and be counted. It’s the Nuno way or no way. This season we have seen many of our players fail. Not so much in their football which has been workman like at the best of times but mentally they have not had the required drive that Nuno and his team would expect. I think. I keep thinking about the condensation dripping down the windows in the Royal London before a game. Ten to three and throw that beer down your throat, we’re going now, hurry up. You burp loudly and check you have everything. The air is cold outside the pub and you join the throng making their way down to the ground. Down the steps to the subway. Past the scratching bloke, past the programme seller who blocks the whole fucking subway. Someone starts singing in the subway. Others join in. It’s loud. Your head is slightly fizzy. You hear the stadium PA, the stadium. Molineux. Fucking hell.

NB: There are some people who live and breathe this club and often we don’t really understand how much this club means to them. They are suffering, we are all suffering a little. The team, Nuno, Fosun, and us. As easy as it is to let that anger out on social media I ask that you all just rein it in a little. I know that we aren’t ‘One Pack’ and probably haven’t been since the early eighties. Angst is real, hate is real too. There is probably some subliminal reason we hate each other, lockdown angst, ego, life problems and it all gets mixed up together and vomited out onto the internet where everybody can see it. If we were still stuck in the 4th division then I guess straighteners would be offered or people would be walking from the ground with noses like a caggy turnip. But you know it’s not like that any more. Have a head wobble. I’ve wobbled mine a bit over the last week for sure. My attempts to fund the blog so it’s lovely and shiny have been sabotaged by nefarious personages, fellow Wolves fans. But you see ‘Fellow Wolves fans’ are a very broad range of people. From the very worst egos amongst us to the very golden. Rich, poor you name it, that’s who walks up to Molineux. But the most important thing is who are you? Where do you fit into the idea of Wolves now? Me? Wolves continue to inspire me and to drive me to attain the same success they have over the past few years. I’m a positive sort of bloke, I can carry much misfortune on my broad back and have done for years. I’m used to that load. I will remain positive and you should too. Forget about mini dramas concerning social media. Forget about Superfans. Think about our team, think positive thoughts and lets grow some more Kwan, lets get sweaty in pubs again. Remember we always wander but we are never lost. Love you Rui get well soon!

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6 responses to “The Wandering Dead”

  1. Spot on again Michael thank you. – (How the hell does Nuno keep himself cool and controlled in the middle of this bloody awful excuse for a football season!)

  2. Thanks Mikey – a little bit of reason from you at this stage of this god awful season.

    Surprised you didn’t have a go at Pawson or VAR, but credit to you for reining in your angst and calming me down, mate.

    Like many I can’t wait to get back to the Mol, even if it is an expensive 270 mile round trip each time lol.

    UTW!

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